Today is April 11, 2023 and I'm currently watching FBI reflecting on the past few weeks....
Yesterday was an emotional and weird day for me. I started my morning like every morning, waking up at 4 am just so my mom can bathe and get me dressed and then fall back to sleep. A few hours later, I tried my hardest to wake up, but I couldn't move at all. It was so scary and I could hardly breathe. I finally woke up and stayed wake until it was time to go to school. Later that morning, I arrived at school and I rolled into the food pantry (where I work) and I suddenly felt this negative energy. I rolled out and went to the library reading room where I tried to meditated and focus on positive energy, but it didn't work. I started having a mini panic attack and I told myself to breathe. I then went to my office to drop my lunch bag off. I ran into an advisor and I just broke down into tears. She asked me what was wrong and I told her that I couldn't do this anymore.
I'm just struggling for the past few weeks with focusing, and actually completing my assignments. I have been very overwhelmed and when I get overwhelmed, I tend to shut down. I've never told anybody this... not even my parents. I usually just find something to distract me or occupy my time, so I don't have to think about everything that I have to do. I know it's bad, but I just feel like it's a mental health thing that I'm going through.
At the end of that day, my mom told me that I had a witch on my back, which also means that there was a demon controlling my body. After she told me that, I was so freaked out. I lit a candle in my room and started talking to the Spirits. My mom also came in and anointed my room with some oil. I usually don't believe in spirits and demons. I only believe in God, the devil and angels.
Yes, this post was about spirits and me struggling, but it's also showing you that I'm not perfect and I am going through a really hard time right now mentally. I love coming on here and expressing myself, because I feel like this is therapy for me. I don't really talk about my feelings with my family or my friends because th they always expect me to be the happy and bright, Kayla. And that's okay. As long as I have a platform to express how I'm feeling and write down some of my goals, it helps me a lot. I believe in manifesting and envisioning my future. What was the worst day in your life and do you manifest the best day in the future? If so, what does that look like? I'll let you know my mine in the next one.
Love,
Kayla
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